Probably due to tramadol side effects, I've been having recurring dreams every night. I hope it will get better with the recovery. I decided to post messages on my slibings facebook walls last night. I thanked them for taking time off from their work to come down to the hospital for past few days. My Mr.Cool brother replied to the post only today. I was very touched with what he posted. He replied saying that it's his responsibility to take care of me and if I encounter any problems, I can always approached him. This is the first time. The first tiime I took the first step out to express my thoughts & feelings towards my slibings. I want to thank God for what he've changed me into in this moment of my life. I thanked him for making me realising the things I've in my life.

Today, I'm feeling good. Right now, I'm feeling great.

Its been a week or more after one of the major operation that I had undergone in my entire life. I've been doing fine and recover-ing well since then. Throughout this period of time, I've always been reminded of God's love for me, with my family, friends & relatives dropping by to visit and keep me accompany. I am thankful for what God have given me. It's definately an opportunity to strenghten the relationship between me and my family. An opportunity to be a better, humble, patience and down-to-earth person. An opportunity to think through whats life is about.

During that period of time, I was challenged by God, with endless wait day by day for operation day to arrive. God challenged my faith and trust in him that he will definately make the operation successful. All I have to do is to wait and be patience & hopeful. It was a indeed a test of my limits because I had to forgo many things I had. I forgo my job, freedom and part-times studies. Nevertheless, during that period of time I stayed at home and make good use of that period of time.

I feel generally in a low mood these days. Calm? maybe after a major operation having to deal with matter of life & death, it starts to set me thinking. I am now thinking what I should do the next phrase of my life. Its time to plan where I should be heading to next. Lastly, I want to thank you for staying and holding on together with me. I think you know who you are. :)

I tried to stay as close to you as possible. I do wonder what kind of endurance test you're putting me through. For all I know the closer you live to God, the smaller things would appear. Please continue to provide me with the faith, hope and love. I love flowers cause they are bright, pretty and hopeful looking.

Non-stop rounds to the toilet. I pray that God will made the charcoal pills that I've bought works. And I know it will definately work! Its one more day to be exact. I know I'll definately gonna be safe & sound in God's hand. For I know I can rest my soul and rely on him. I will be embraced and covered by his warmth hands.

Dear God,
Today, I thanked you for the times that you've given me to spend with my love ones before my operation. I was never forgotten or forsaken by the people who loves me during this period of time. I thanked you for the precious moments that you made it happened. I've kept the good faith because I know you are here for me. I thanked you for making use of the people and things around me to discover you. Discovering you was greatest thing that could ever happened to me. This is the true joy of life. Thank you for loving me. Thank you for allowing me to discover my purposes in life. And now, my life has a purpose with you around. Thank you.

Ineffable me, my thoughts and feelings; incapable of expressing them in words. To me, it's indescribable, unutterable & unspeakable most of the time! I don't speak well. My language is bad. I don't want to much and most importantly, I don't want to be alone. Today, I've come across why being together is better.

"Two are better off than one, because together they can work more effectively. If one of them falls down, the other can help him up..Two people can resist attack that would defeat one person alone. A rope made of three cords is hard to break." I thanked him for all the wisdow he gave me today and the days to come.

"You meant it for bad, but he meant it for good. You meant it for destroy me, but he used it to develope you. You meant it to tear me down, but he used it to make you a strong and more mature person." He have ways higher than you and me.

What do people do when they start going through their memories? They realised that they have regrets and maybe at the same time felt lonely. This could be due to the transitions of life. New experience to deal with is lonely. Here am I keeping the good fight and faith, but how can I continue the race without further regrets in life?

"Sometimes life just ain't all about your failures."

What do you do when your marriage fails? You learnt to Eat, Pray and Love. Liz Gilbert (Julia Roberts) had everything a modern woman is supposed to dream of having a husband, a house, a successful career yet like so many others, she found herself lost, confused, and searching for what she really wanted in life. Newly divorced and at a crossroads, Gilbert steps out of her comfort zone, risking everything to change her life, embarking on a journey around the world that becomes a quest for self discovery.

In her travels, she discovers the true pleasure of nourishment by eating in Italy; the power of prayer in India, and, finally and unexpectedly, the inner peace and balance of true love in Bali. Based upon the bestselling memoir by Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love proves that there really is more than one way to let yourself go and see the world. Movie release on 7th October 2010.

"Doing for the audience of one, not to many others." Its never about religion or conversion is about the begining of my personal relationship with you. With you, nothing ever fails.

So when I tried to search for the meaning of 'change' online, a number pages and lines came out. And then I asked myself: 'what kind of change I think I am referring to?'. Fear & insecurity comes about with change. Today, what are my fears? What are my insecurites?

Everything is possible because of you. Thank you for the good times I had with my love ones today and also for the beautiful times that I had for the past few days. It was well-spent. Thank you in advance, for i know there a power in thankfulness.

"
Our greatest enemy is our own attitude". Fourteen days. Learn to relax with faith.

Directed by Emmy Award winner Robert Kenner, the film looks at corporate farming in America, where food production is abusive of animals and environmentally harmful.

Food, Inc. reveals shocking truths about what we eat, how its produced, who we have become as a nation and where we are going from here. Here, we discover what you have been eating. Oct 10 Sunday, 7pm on ChannelNewsAsia.

When your mind decides to quit from somebody you are not, half of the load is already taken off. Choose the way you want to response to your life. Let him walk you through.

I will pray for you, cause I know god will answer my prayer for you. For he has his plans for me and you.